On Friday Amazon suggested that I buy a book. Usually I ignore their suggestions because they don't interest me, this week was different, this week I think Amazon must have been listening to God.
The book they suggested piqued my interest, and after perusing the content and reviews I downloaded it. And I read, and I read, and I cried, and I felt God confront me and the way I live my life. For a few years now God has been changing the way I view the Christian life, and over the last couple of years he has formed within me the possibility of something very different. We are beginning to pursue this in our church and we aren't completely certain where it will end...but I digress.
The book Amazon suggested was, 'The Barefoot Church' by Brandon Hatmaker - read it at your peril. (No, seriously, read it!) Hatmaker tells the story of his transition from 'church as usual' to the core of their church life being to serve the poor and needy in their city. There's a lot more than that (you can read it yourselves...when you BUY THE BOOK!), but that is the theme that has troubled me and now confronts me. Let me explain.
My conviction is that the church is the visible expression of the presence of God's kingdom. I love the way Tom Wright puts it, “This is what it's like when God’s in charge.” If this is a true conviction - and I am biblically positive that it is, just read the NT - then our lives, individually and in community, should carry the example set by Jesus and the early church. It's not my place or my right to judge how others live, but my shame is that my life doesn't image the kingdom the way Jesus did.
I know all the objections and caveats that spring to mind right now, and some of them are valid, but just press pause for a moment and consider the values and virtues of the kingdom of God compared to how we often live. I am convicted by the amount of time, money and resources spent on making me comfortable for an hour or so on a Sunday when people are homeless and hungry in my city. I am assured that people won't attend church in summer if we don't air-condition our buildings, and I know the truth of this, and I wonder what would happen to our faith is there was real opposition to the church, if our faith truly cost us something?
Following Jesus was never presented as a comfortable lifestyle in the New Testament, it was always difficult and costly. Yet we live a comfortable Christianity without real sacrifice. Even the call to give and serve is often so that our church can provide better facilities and resources for........us.
I know this sounds negative, and I'm sorry. I don't want to criticise other people, I just want to ask the question, “Is our faith supposed to be about us or about others?” In answering that question we could reply that we desire to preach the gospel, to get people to heaven, and that is a good intention. The gospel changes lives and is the good news that God has set in motion his plan to redeem his creation, to establish his kingdom by Jesus’ sacrifice and victory as the world’s true Lord. But have we read the gospels?
Jesus preached the kingdom, and demonstrated it by caring for the sick, the hurting, the needy and the marginalized. The kingdom of God isn't seen by how much we have for ourselves, but how much we give (read, time, talent and resources) for the ’least of these.’ This isn't the social gospel or a technique to get people ’saved,’ it's being followers of Jesus and carriers of God’s love for humanity. Jesus didn't seem to concern himself about whether the people he ministered to ended up following him or not - although I'm sure he did. He did what was right and represented the grace, mercy, love and justice of God’s kingdom.
This is my challenge, this is the disturbing and confronting reality that God has brought crashing into my heart. In what way is my life and that of my faith community truly reflecting the sacrificial and selfless concern of God for his creation?
I could write so much more, God is messing with my head in so many ways. If you have found this negative or even rambling, I'm really sorry. In some ways this blog addition was just for me. But I am deeply convicted by God that, for me, so many things must change.
So let me leave you with a paraphrase of a few verses from Matthew 25 (with a slight addition from me) that were quoted in ’Barefoot Church’:
“I was hungry while you had all you needed. I was thirsty, but you drank bottled water. I was a stranger, and you wanted me deported (or at least processed off-shore). I needed clothes, but you needed more clothes. I was sick, and you pointed out the behaviors that led to my sickness. I was in prison, and you said I was getting what I deserved.”
In what ways does the life of Jesus challenge you? Are there some aspects or our Christian walk that need re-evaluating?
It's Father's Day, so I thought it only appropriate that I blog about dads. There are three aspects of fatherhood that immediately spring to mind - my dad, being a dad, and God as my Father. These relationships are a significant (I could say almost dominant) part of who I am and how I live my life. So, what comes to mind on Father's Day?
My dad died when I was eight years old. Research tells us that late childhood to early adolescence is the hardest time to lose a parent. I don't know if that's true, but it was for me. My mum was an amazing lady, but she wasn't a dad. In some ways she caused me to miss him more by telling me stories about this seemingly perfect man. My own memories of him are enmeshed with her stories, so I grew up without a dad and wondering how I could ever live up to the image of him that I carried.
From what I know I am a lot like my dad. We both care deeply about people, love sport, value family, and give some leadership to the tribes we belong to. These are good attributes for which I am thankful. I wish he had lived so I could have really known him and he could have enjoyed his daughter-in-law and grand-children. I wish I hadn't gone through a times when I resented him for leaving me so young. I wish he had been a tangible role-model rather than a memory.
I can wish for many things and not receive them. What I have received from my dad, apart from the genetic qualities I have inherited and the fond memories I carry, is the gift of self-awareness. Working through the grief, hurt, resentment, disappointment and even, I learned, a fear of abandonment has caused me to understand myself better and grow as a person. I am a better man, husband and father because of these struggles. For someone who is an extrovert and naturally poor at self-reflection this is a valuable gift.
When I became a dad my world was changed. I sought to be all I thought my dad was and all he might have been had he lived. I discovered that being a dad is a difficult and natural role. There are some aspects of fatherhood that are easy and require no effort at all, and others that need hard work and development. One very wise dad in our church called fatherhood, "A wild ride", and he's right. We get stuff wrong, we get stuff right, and, thankfully, kids are resilient and bounce. Being a dad isn't an easy gig, but it's a worthwhile one.
My children are a huge part of defining who I am. I don't just mean in the role that I play as a parent but in my relationships with them as people, and as reflections of the best and worst of me. I see myself more clearly in their lives. This brings great joy and concern, but mainly it brings humility. My children are a mix of me, my wife and themselves. They help me to see my part in this world with greater clarity and the legacy I am leaving. My children will shape our tomorrow. They have brought out feelings I didn't know I possessed and have taught me so much.
I will never stop being a dad and that means I can never stop growing and caring and being astounded at what these people who bear a little of my image (they get their good looks from their mother and their appetites from me...) become and achieve.
A mistake we often make is to apply our understanding of fatherhood to God. Rather, the opposite is necessary, that we apply our understanding of God to being a father (or parent, if you prefer). The fatherhood of God defines his relationship to his creation and to his unique relationship to Jesus, his Son, God incarnate and the second person of the Trinity. Who God is, how he interacts with us, his character and his actions, all inform us as to how to be fathers and mothers, family and friends - human.
Where I can see qualities of my dad in my personality and elements of my personality in my children, I am encouraged that my heavenly Father is, by his Spirit, forming elements of his character in me. His love, mercy, grace and justice bring definition to how I live my life. I may be a flawed and imperfect copy of my Father, but by his grace I am a work-in-progress.
I consider being a dad one of my greatest challenges and privileges. The concept of 'dad' has shaped how I see myself, other people and my world. The power of memory, self-awareness, love, joy, humility, sacrifice, transformation and hope are all tied up in the little word, dad.
The idea of 'dad' means different things to different people. There are good dads, bad dads, and terrible dads. There are absentee dads and intentionally present dads. Often (mostly?) there are confused dads. Most of us try to do our best knowing that it will never be perfect but hoping that it is enough. And thankfully, mostly, it is.
As another Father's Day ended and I went to bed with presents, meaningful words in a card and having eaten far too much, I thought again about these three aspects of fatherhood: my dad, being a dad, and my Father. I realized that they are connected. I have tried to become what I feel I missed out on understood through the paradigm our Father God. And this brings me purpose, contentment and joy.
This was a good Father's Day.
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